25 February, 2006
What does it mean when a girl buys a short dress or skirt? What's she trying to tell herself? No, I mean a girl like me, a woman in fact, who's not.. for god knows... not since those little A-line chord numbers in the early to mid nineties. I wish it was grunge still....
I did grunge so well.
I was clean for a start.
...........
But what was the problem then? The problem was the boys were all jocks- the boys I liked. The others- the guys you smoked cones with- the boys that you drank rocketfuel with and made out under bushes and got grass in your hair for- I never really found them attractive.
Dilema.
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Those boys- you'd sit around and have cones with them too- you'd drink rocketfuel- you'd have pretend sex in bunk beds- the christian ones anyway- you'd have almost real sex in single beds.... then when did it change?
So why fight it? Because I never thought that they'd like me back? Enough have so I should get over that maybe?
Because some of them were scary- most guys are at times- and if they're bigger than you they are scary and bigger.
Control.
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He rode down to the station and picked me up- on his bike- I rode the bike and he ran the whole way- just everything worked and he ran and ran and I had to peddle kinda fast to keep up.
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You glow when you're like that.