17 October, 2003
Learning curve alert.
This is really hard. All this learning business.
I feel like I'm recovering from an addiction and going around making amends.
Its like a fucking truth serum.
Hi I love you but...
and then the reams of discoloured cloth comes tumbling out.
you know that you have to wonder about the heart's capabilities when you have a day like todays.
today.. today was madness.
let's do it all again tomorrow hey?
I think I'm going away on Sunday.
If I get to drink a beer on the deck and watch the sun set I'll have kittens on the spot. They'll jump outta my ears or something.
And on Saturday I have a bbq that will be not unlike a job interview. Hi, I would like to be your new friend, please pick me for the posistion cos I think you're too amazing for the real world.
Nah I'll have to figure out a different way to say it.
Breakfast in the morning with Miss Victoria.
Not to mention we're all getting sued tomorrow.
Well thankfully not be personally but everyone else is.
And that's no joke. Sometimes I forget that I stuck around this long because we had all this court business to attention to and then days like today happen.
Someone told me I was beautiful the other night and ..
and someone else called me and I could smell them and see them over the phone (no just my imagination I'm afraid)...
and ...
I should any second turn into the backwards speaking dwarf from Twin Peaks... cos that's about as close to me at the moment as you'll get.
I wish when we fell in love with people it actually went away eventually... pick wisely cos it doesn't go away.